Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Diary of a Hater

I hate Reggae. I think it is annoying and grating and simplistic.

Reggae is dance music - it is music to be played at clubs for people to dance to. Reggae is fundamentally Pop. Bob Marley = Britney Spears. The great and esteemed Bob Marley wrote derivative dance songs that sounded like every other Reggae dance song. Yet somehow he ended up on the walls of many confused, annoying, white college kids.



Yo bro, I love Linkin Park and all, but when I want to chillax, I just put on Bob.

At least he's sincere. Nothing is worse than shitty white folks playing shitty Reggae.

Dear OAR, your song "Crazy Game of Poker" is the worst song ever written. First off, it's way too long, if your song is longer than Bohemian Rhapsody, and 1/100th as good, there are problems. Second, you guys aren't allowed to try to cajole the crowd into saying "Jah" and "revolution" - you know, cause you're shitty white dudes and your audience is comprised solely of shitty white dudes.

Dear Sublime, just stop. It was bad enough when you were a band and your lead singer wasn't dead yet - but still touring without him? Ouch. Why do people love Sublime? Lowest common denominator punk mixed with lowest common denominator Reggae mixed with pop - that's their recipe for success and I'm sending it back. No thanks.




Also hating:
back pain
Lebron James
being so far from my birthday

Not hating:
SWT
rice cooker
cap'n Jazz

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